Jewelcase CD. Cover art by Lord Gawad, CD "antler" artwork provided by Jessica Kellner.
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Tim Stephenson recites excerpts from Zapffe's "The Last Messiah" in this track. Used with friendly permission from Gisle R. Tangenes (c)
lyrics
From the moment the child embarks on his journey down the river of life, the roar of death’s waterfall fills the valley, always nearer and nearer; it gnaws, gnaws at the child’s happiness. Man looks out over the earth, and it breathes like a great lung; when it exhales, delicate and graceful life teems out of its pores, and all the creatures stretch out their arms to the sun; but when it takes in its breath, a rustle of fragile spirits breaking sweeps through the multitudes, and their corpses lash the ground like showers of hail.
Brought from nil into the light
Became a secular vice
The billionth miracle I am
Sunkissed and baptised
Flung into earthly delights
Clung to the dawn in my sight
Blinded I now stand
My home I benight
Deflowered, the years took their toll
Washed you up, buried you beneath soil
Macerated your skin and bones
Created a dream for you, and you alone
Deflowered, the years took their toll
Washed me up, buried me beneath soil
Macerated my skin and bones
Created a nightmare for me, and me alone
Indoctrinated
Alleviated
Assuaged
Downplayed
Isolation
Sublimation
Diversion
Connection
It was passed through generations, father and son
Lit up your whole life and made you your home
Now time has elapsed, the torch passed onto me
The fire has engulfed me, hurt me, broken my zeal
At first, I held it in highest esteem
Cradled and guarded it like my own flesh and blood
A miracle unparalleled, a blessing from a god
As this boon enlightens my soul
It escalated far beyond my control
As I latch onto your breast
Your essence shrivelled, parched and famished
Your lifeblood exhausted
Your breath waning, your joy vanished
As you latch onto my breast
My essence shrivelled, parched and famished
My lifeblood exhausted
My breath waning, my joy vanished
He sees his genesis in his mother’s womb, he holds out his hand and sees that it has five branches. Where does this accursed five come from, and what does that have to do with his soul? He is no longer simply at one with himself; in terror he touches his body: this is you and you extend so far, and no farther. He carries a meal inside himself, yesterday it was an animal running freely about by its own will, now he is absorbing it, making it a part of himself; where does he begin and where does he end? Things blend into each other in sequences of cause and effect, and everything he tries to seize and hold dissolves before his probing thoughts.
Soon he sees mechanics behind everything. At last, the nature of things is only his own nature, nothing exists but himself, every road winds back to himself, the world is but a ghostly echo of his own voice—he leaps up with a shriek and wants to vomit himself onto the earth, together with his foul meal, he feels insanity approaching...
